This gem was told to me by an fellow employee after I had sent the customer to electronics. The customer was looking for a phone. She found the aisle, pulls an employee over and asks for land line phones. She's standing right in front of them. The employee politely points them out. This customer kept insisting they weren't the phones that you find in your house, while the employee tried to convince her they were. I don't know if she bought anything, but if she did it's being returned. Not that there was anything wrong with it that she would know of as she probably wouldn't even know how to open the box.

"I'm alright, THANKS FOR ASKING"

So this lady comes through my line with two coffee mugs. She informed that one "sliced her finger." I looked at it and noticed it was broken, and put it aside...it happens, you know? She then says, "Yeah, I'm alright though, thanks for asking," in the bitchiest tone she could fester. I'm sorry, was I supposed to drop my knees and beg for you to allow me to kiss it better? Sorry you're not getting laid this Valentine's Day, but don't take it out on me.

It has no cord

Customer #1: We need two blenders, this is the only one on the shelf and the person back there already said you have no more in the store, can we have the floor model even though it has no cord.

Me: We don't sell floor models

Joker who was with customer #1: Can we just take it even though it has no cord?

Me: No, What good is it unless you plan on installing a new cord?

Joker with customer #1: Can I steal it?

Me: No, security will stop you. And it has no cord.

Joker with customer #1: Can I take it out of the garbage?

Me: No.

Joker looks as customer #1: We'll just have to get another kid of blender.

Me after they left: Yeah one with a cord might help.